"Arrr! With Kennedy on the ship’s list, Vance be jabberin’ 'bout health to the good folk of Michigan!"
2024-10-08
Arrr, mateys! Senator JD Vance o' Ohio be spoutin' tales o’ strange childhood ailments, reckonin' they be caused by peculiar muck in our grub and grog! Aye, beware the weirdness in yer vittles, or ye might sprout a third eye or turn into a barnacle! Ha-ha!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout the curious words of Senator JD Vance from the fair land of Ohio! This scallywag be speakin' of strange ailments what plague the wee ones, callin' 'em “weird childhood diseases.” Aye, a curious matter indeed!With a furrowed brow and a voice as loud as a cannon, he declared that these odd maladies might be caused by “weird stuff” floatin' about in our vittles and grog. Arrr, one can only wonder if it be the seaweed stew or perhaps that mysterious glimmerin’ liquid in the water barrel!
Could it be the cursed kraken’s toenails in the fish stew, or a pinch o’ pixie dust gone wrong? Or mayhaps the farmers be addin' too much of that strange elixir known as “chemicals” to their crops? Aye, the good Senator be pointin' a finger at our daily grub, and I be wonderin' if we should be checkin' our rum for any suspicious swirls!
So, me mateys, heed the warning of ol' JD, and keep a weather eye on yer plates. Let none of us be turnin' into landlubbers with a taste for the bizarre! Now, let’s raise a tankard to health and hearty feasts without the weirdness! Yarrr!