Arrr! Alex Salmond, the jolly Scot who flirted with freedom, has sailed to Davy Jones at the ripe age of 69!
2024-10-13
Arrr, me hearties! The jolly captain Alex Salmond, once the grand commander of Scotland’s independence ship, has sailed to Davy Jones' locker at the ripe age of 69 in Ohrid, North Macedonia. May his spirit roam the seas and his spirit be as bold as his dreams!
Avast ye scallywags! Gather round as I spin ye the tale of Alex Salmond, the bold former captain of Scotland’s independence ship, who sailed into the great beyond at the age of 69! This rogue was a fierce foe of the British crown and nearly hoisted the flag of freedom during the referendum of 2014, but alas, he only snagged 45% of the booty!He met his end in the fair town of Ohrid, where he was fixin’ to charm the crowd at a cultural shindig. News of his passing sent waves across Scotland, with tributes aplenty, even from the likes of King Charles III, who lamented the loss of a true sailor of Scotland's spirit. His old mate, Prime Minister Keir Starmer, dubbed him a “monumental figure,” though he was more of a tempest in a teapot to some!
Salmond’s legacy be bittersweet, for he was charged with misdeeds, yet cleared his name. He even tried to raise a new flag with a party called Alba, but it floundered like a fish out of water. Despite the turbulent seas of politics and his squabbles with the fair lass Nicola Sturgeon, his contributions couldn’t be denied. So here’s to Alex, a shipmate who dreamed of a Scotland free as the wind! Arrr!