The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Trump be wantin’ the National Guard to swab the deck o’ the enemy lurkin' beneath the plank! Har har!

2024-10-15

Arrr, that scallywag Trump be suggestin' summonin' the National Guard on Election Day to fend off "the treacherous enemy from within," which he calls "radical left lunatics!" When asked 'bout Biden's worries o' chaos, he laughed, sayin' the real trouble be from them landlubbers! Aye, what a merry jest!

Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round as I regale ye with a tale o' the high seas of politics! Former Captain Trump, in a recent parley on Fox News’s “Sunday Morning Futures,” be suggestin’ that the fearsome National Guard or even the military might need to set sail on Election Day! Aye, he claims there be chaos brewin’ from what he calls “the enemy from within!” Arrr, these scallywags he be pointin’ at are none other than those “radical left lunatics!”

In his treasure-laden interview, our bold captain dismissed the fears of President Biden, who be worryin’ about a peaceful Election Day. “Nay!” Trump be sayin’, “The real threat be the traitorous crew within our own ranks!” It seems he thinks the ruckus might come not from the open seas, but from the hearties sittin' at their own tables, causin’ mischief and mayhem! Aye, it be a curious plight when a captain fears mutiny from his own crew more than the stormy seas ahead!

So hoist the Jolly Roger and prepare for raucous times ahead, me hearties! The political seas be choppy, and it seems ol' Trump be ready to battle his imagined foes, all while battlin’ for his treasure of votes! Aye, let the games begin!

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