Arrr! WaPo scribe be callin' out Bezos' blarney on not backin' Trump—seems he's bowin' to the wrong matey!
2024-10-30
Arrr, me hearties! Columnist Jennifer Rubin be squawkin’ that ol’ sea dog Jeff Bezos, the treasure hoardin’ owner of the Washington Post, be raisin’ a ruckus by droppin’ presidential endorsements like a barnacle! Aye, she claims it be a "horrible precedent," like a parrot without a perch! Har har!
Arrr, mateys! Aye be tellin' ye of a scallywag named Jeff Bezos, the coin-clinkerin' master of the Washington Post, who be causin’ quite the ruckus! Jennifer Rubin, a bold columnist, be callin' his latest fib a "bulls--- explanation" fer not endorsin' a presidential scallywag in 2024. She be wonderin’ why the black-hearted billionaire suddenly decided to shun the candidates, when no such nonsense was afoot in 2020!Rubin be thinkin’ this foul decision be bendin' the knee to the nefarious Donald Trump, who’s wagin' a war on democracy like a landlubber in a tavern brawl! With subscriptions droppin’ faster than a cannonball in the sea, she be lamentin' the loss of moral clarity that the readers crave. "How could ye not understand, ye scurvy dog?" she be hissin' at Bezos, plead’n for the truth over deceit!
But alas, Bezos be squawkin' 'bout the media's credibility, claimin' it be a bitter pill to swallow, whilst the crew in the Post’s newsroom be in an uproar, facin' the fallout of his tone-deaf ramblings! So hoist the sails, me hearties, for the winds of change be blowin', and there be a storm brewin' on the horizon of opinion and free press! Arrr!