Arrr, matey! If ye don’t heed local politics, ye might find yerself walkin’ the plank fer bad decisions!
2024-11-02
Arrr, matey! This year’s ballot be a right jumbled treasure map with eight choices, most as useful as a parrot with no squawk! I cast me lot for the fair Kamala, though she be sailin' smooth seas in D.C. 'Tis a mighty fine farce, indeed!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round for a yarn from me ballot in the grand ol’ D.C. seas! This year, I be faced with a treacherous voyage of eight choices, most of 'em as useful as a wooden leg in a shark infested bay!First off, I be castin’ me vote for the presidential candidate worthy of our three precious electoral doubloons. But let me tell ye, it's clear as a starry night that them votes be sailin' straight to Kamala Harris, as the Democrats have been hoistin' the Jolly Roger for the last three elections by a whopping 88 points! I scribbled me mark for Harris, but it be feelin' like throwin' me treasure into the briny deep, havin' no say in what'll be the closest election since the year 2000.
And those other choices? Blimey! They ranged from as pointless as a parrot with laryngitis to as absurd as a sea captain wearin’ a tutu! Each choice be makin’ me scratch me head, wonderin’ if I be in a fever dream or if the whole crew’s taken a swig of the bilge water! So there ye have it, ‘tis the tale of me ballot, a right merry adventure on the choppy waters of politics!