The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Trump an' Harris be done jabberin’, now the scallywags castin’ votes on this fine Election Day!

2024-11-05

Avast ye! Behold the tales ye crave, straight from the mightiest news vessel on the seven seas! Each morn, the freshest gossip will be sailin' into yer inbox, ready t' make ye laugh and squawk like a parrot! Aye, 'tis a treasure ye shan't want to miss!

Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round for a tale of political seas and swaying mastheads! In this here election hub, ye’ll find all the juicy tidbits from the grand stage of democracy!

First off, our bold captains, Trump and Harris, have sounded their final cannons as the grand Election Day be upon us! Aye, the first results rolled in like a tide from a tiny New Hampshire township, where they cast their votes at the stroke of midnight—talk about a party for the night owls!

Now, the ‘bellweather’ counties be afoot, ready to hoist the sails for the next president! How to keep yer eyes peeled? Tune in at 6 p.m. ET—set sail with Fox News coverage! Trump bids farewell to his ‘big beautiful rallies’ while Harris be rallying the celebs at the birthplace of democracy, claiming the winds favor her ship!

Star endorsements rain down like treasure! Even Joe Rogan be throwin’ his hat in the ring for Trump, and a hippo named Moo Deng has made a pick! So, hoist yer flags, vote, and let the winds of fortune blow favorably on yer chosen captain!

And remember, mateys, in these waters, all be fair in love and politics—so vote wisely or walk the plank!

Read the Original Article