The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, me hearties! Biden be tossin' treasure to Ukraine so they can keep battlin' like scallywags next year, says Blinken!

2024-11-14

Arrr, matey! Cap’n Biden be plunderin’ the treasury, sendin’ gold to Ukraine 'fore the ship of state sails under a new captain come January! Blinken be sayin’ every doubloon be flyin’ out the door like a seagull at a fish feast! Avast, let the treasure flow!

Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn from the land of the free, where the mighty Captain Biden be at the helm! Aye, the good ol' captain be makin' promises like a sailor with a chest full o' doubloons! In a grand gathering in Brussels, his trusty First Mate, Antony Blinken, declared that ol' Joe be ready to send forth treasures to Ukraine—more than a ship full of rum on a Friday night!

“As much aid as possible!” he be claimin', as if he were handin' out pieces of eight to every scallywag in the tavern. They be pushin' every last doubloon out the door faster than a hungry pirate runnin' from the law, all 'fore the fateful day of January 20th—when ol' Donald Trump be settin' sail back to the captain’s chair! Blimey! With the clock tickin' down, it be a race to see how many gold coins can be tossed to the Ukrainian crew before the new captain takes the wheel.

So, raise yer tankards and toast to the madness of politics, where aid flows like grog on a stormy sea, and may the winds be ever in favor of the Biden ship until the tide be turnin’ once more!

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