The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Donna be sayin’ Taylor Swift be too tangled in her fame to feast with the family this Thanksgiving!

2024-11-15

Arrr, me hearties! Donna Kelce, mother of that scallywag Travis of the Chiefs, be sayin' on Thursday, "Nay, Taylor Swift won’t be joinin' our Thanksgiving feast this year!" Aye, it seems the lass be too busy warbling to join our merry crew!

Arrr, me hearties! It be the season of givin’ thanks, but it seems that Donna Kelce, mother o’ the mighty Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis, be settin’ a sparse table this year. Aye, Taylor Swift, the grand siren of the pop seas, shan’t be droppin’ anchor for the Kelce family feast, as she be sailin’ the globe on her "Eras Tour." Donna, speakin' on the "Today" show, be sayin’, "I don’t think so, she’s busier than a one-legged pirate in a scurvy battle!"

With no fixed plans for the feast, it seems the family be focused on a different kind o’ celebration as Travis prepares for a clash against the Las Vegas Raiders on Black Friday. "I’ll be at the football battleground, where football be the true spirit of the holidays!" Donna declared, with a wink and a hearty laugh.

The Chiefs be undefeated this season—aye, the only crew to boast such glory! But they face a fearsome foe, the Buffalo Bills, on Sunday. As for Taylor, her tour be takin’ her to the great north, but whether she’ll make it back in time to cheer for Travis be as uncertain as a ship lost in a storm.

So, hoist the flags and pass the turkey, for football be the family tradition, and it seems that’s what this crew be thankin’ for this year!

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