Arrr! ESPN scallywag frettin’ over Cap’n Jerry Jones, thinkin’ ol’ Biden be sailin’ into the stormy seas!
2024-11-19
Arrr, matey! ESPN's own Stephen A. Smith be frettin' over the fate of Captain Jerry Jones after his crew, the Cowboys, sailed into a storm 'gainst the Texans last night. Methinks the poor lad be needin' a stiff grog to weather this squall!
Arrr, me hearties! It be Stephen A. Smith, the ESPN swashbuckler, who be ponderin' over the fate of the ole Dallas Cowboys after they took a tumble at the hands of the Houston Texans! Aye, he be usin’ words like “sad” and “meltdown,” as he be likin’ to revel in the Cowboys’ plight, yet found himself feelin' a bit glum this day.Smith, with a furrowed brow, be comparin’ the Cowboys' owner, Jerry Jones, to President Biden, sayin’ he be worried ‘bout their health. He spoke of Jones’ press conferences as a stormy sea of confusion, where he be spoutin’ nonsense like a parched sailor. Aye, he noted the similarities ‘twixt the two old sea dogs, both bein’ near the same age—nearly a month apart, by the looks of it!
It seems ol' Jerry be needin’ a lifeboat, what with his players lookin’ like they be needin’ a therapist, and coach McCarthy meltin' like ice in a barrel o' rum. Smith, bless his soul, declared it a cruel jest to keep laughin’ at the Cowboys’ fate, for they be in dire straits this season, a shameful 3-7. So, raise the black flag, me mateys, as the Cowboys sail into the stormy night!