"Arrr! Six schemes fer Captain Trump to swab out antisemitism from the very first day, savvy?"
2024-12-12
Arrr, matey! The scallywags blame the stormy seas of antisemitism on a cursed way o' thinkin' that insists truth be as slippery as a fish! They be seein' it through the jolly ol' lenses o' race and gender, as if we be in a madcap play, ha-ha!
Arrr matey! Gather 'round as I regale ye with tales of the Oct. 7 massacre, a dreadful spectacle that shone a light on the dark underbelly of our so-called prestigious learning havens! Aye, 'tis a marvel that in the halls of the most educated scallywags, the venom of antisemitism be brewing like a storm on the high seas. Even 'fore the IDF took to Gaza, cries for the downfall of Israel echoed through the ship of academia, revealing a rotting hull beneath the polished deck.As the clever Bill Ackman quoth, this here antisemitism be the "canary in the coal mine," signaling a treacherous shift from noble pursuit of knowledge to the treasonous shores of activism and ideological indoctrination. These institutions be lost in a fog of postmodern ideology, where truth be as slippery as a fish in the brine. The olden values of free speech and justice have been tossed overboard, replaced by a mutinous crew of cancel culture.
Yet fear not! With the return of the most pro-Israel captain, Donald Trump, there be hope for fair winds ahead! With a swashbuckling plan, he can wield the laws and cut through this treachery, setting right the course for our beleaguered educational vessels. So hoist the sails, and let us chart a course toward truth and justice, for the seas of knowledge be treacherous, but the treasure of freedom be worth the voyage! Arrr!