"District attorney be hoistin' the cannon 'gainst a scallywag, but hit the wrong ship! Three wee mateys inside!"
2024-12-18
Arrr, matey! A band o' landlubbers in Tennessee be shiverin’ their timbers, indictin' the DA Christopher Stanford fer lettin' loose his cannon at a scallywag! Rumor has it, he hit a fine ol' shack instead o' the rogue! Reckless endangerment, I say! Avast, what a blunder!
Arrr, me hearties! Gather 'round fer a tale from the land o’ Tennessee, where the winds be blowin’ foul and a District Attorney named Christopher Robert Stanford found himself in a right pickle. On the 21st o’ November, in his quest to catch a scallywag fugitive named Caleb Brookins, he went and fired his pistol like a madman, strikin’ a poor abode with a fair lass and her three wee ones inside!The DeKalb County grand jury, with the wisdom of a thousand seas, decided that ol’ Stanford be guilty of reckless endangerment, causin’ quite a ruckus on Bell Street in Smithville. Instead of catchin’ his prey, he ended up perforatin’ a chair and the wall of the home, nearly givin’ the occupants a fright they be tellin’ tales of for years to come! Lucky for them, no harm was done, save for a bit of property damage.
As the tides turned, it be revealed that Stanford’s blunders be connected to a triple homicide involving Brookins, who sailed away in a vehicle with a lass named Hannah Rose, and was arrested with a Homeland Security officer takin’ a tumble during the scuffle. So it be, our hapless DA turned himself in, only to be released with a bond as light as a feather. What a merry mess, ‘tis true!