"Yarr, them landlubber pro-Palestinian scallywags be tossed from Michigan's student ship, like rotting fish off the deck!"
2024-12-24
Arrr, matey! The captain and first mate of the University of Michigan's crew be tossed overboard after they cried for treasure to be buried and halted the merry shanties on deck! Aye, what a ruckus on the high seas of academia!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round and lend an ear to this tale o' treachery on the shores of academia! The mighty University of Michigan, a place where young scallywags be learnin' their trade, found itself in a ruckus most foul. The president and vice president of the student assembly, those fine mates, set sail on a wild quest for divestment, demandin' the cuttin' of ties with certain funds that be smellin' like rotten fish.But lo! As they hoisted their sails high, shoutin' for justice and stoppin' the doubloons from flowin' into campus activities, the winds of discontent began to blow. The powers that be, them high-falutin’ university officials, did not take kindly to such bold maneuvers. “Avast ye!” they cried, and with a mighty stroke, they impeached the brave captain and his trusty mate! Aye, it be a spectacle of mutiny and madness!
So here be a lesson for all ye landlubbers: tread lightly when ye be demandin’ changes in the realm of higher learnin’. For ye might just find yerself walkin’ the plank of impeachment, with naught but the fishy waters below! Yarrr, the winds of change be a dangerous sea, and not all who sail it come back to tell the tale!