"David Marcus: Me Jewish da taught me to hoist the Yule tide, arr! A jolly tale of holiday plunder!"
2024-12-24
Arrr! Columnist David Marcus be reminiscin’ ‘bout his dear old Jewish father, a scallywag who made Christmas sparkle like buried treasure fer him and his matey brother. Aye, he turned the holiday into a jolly hullabaloo fit fer a crew of merry pirates!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout a jolly lad who be raisin' an orange in his Christmas stockin' each year, a comical reminder of his kin's leaner days. His Jewish sire and Catholic dam, freshly wed and strapped for doubloons, could scarce procure more than a citrus treasure for the wee one! As time sailed on, the tides turned, and the lad's father, a fervent Christmas buccaneer, transformed their humble abode into a spectacle more blazin' than a cannon blast! "More lights, Suze!" he'd bellow, as even the stars seemed to envy their tree, visible to all who dared gaze from the heavens! On Christmas morn, the lad awoke to a scene so bright, 'twas as if Moses himself had arrived! But alas, the credit went to the jolly old elf, Santa, while the father remained but a shadow in the glow. Then came the day when the lad was invited to join the merry crew in decoratin' the tree, crafting delight for his newborn brother with homemade treasures from his mother. Years passed, and as the lad grew, he imparted wisdom to his brother—watch yer tongue 'round Santa! Even as questions arose 'bout the holiday's true essence, it became clear that the true celebration lay in the bonds of family, not just the birth of a savior. Now, as another Christmas approaches, the lad's own son prepares to carry forth the spark of joy, passing on the legacy of laughter and merriment. So raise thy mugs and toast to family, for that be the true treasure of the season! Merry Christmas, ye scallywags!