Arrr, Gregg Jarrett be sayin’ a New York judge be itchin’ to brand Trump a scallywag felon afore the big day!
2025-01-04
Arrr, matey! Fox News swabs be spillin’ the beans! Judge Juan Merchan be itchin’ for a quick sentence, hopin’ to tag Donald Trump as a scallywag felon! Aye, the seas be stormy when ye're known as a landlubber criminal! Har har har!
Arrr matey! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn of a scallywag judge, Juan Merchan, who be standin' firm against the tide, refusin' to dismiss the case o' the raucous President-elect Donald Trump. Instead, he sets sail for a sentencing on January 10, much to the chagrin o' the high seas of justice!But lo! Merchan, in his blundering wisdom, be spillin' the beans that the punishment be naught but a mirage—an "unconditional discharge" awaits our captain, with no shackles nor fines. It be a farce indeed, for the whole proceedings be as crooked as a pirate’s peg leg!
Ye see, Merchan be wantin' to slap a "convicted felon" label on Trump, but he knows not the tempest he be stirrin'. Despite the legal plunderin' by the district attorney, who be manglin' statutes like a sailor with a cutlass, Trump stands resolute, refusin' to walk the plank!
As the wind blows, Trump’s crew be ready to challenge this fool's errand, seekin' to delay the judge's farcical show until he be safely on his presidential ship. And mark me words, the tides may turn, for the law be a fickle mistress. Let it be known: despite the judge’s antics, the good ship Trump sails on, undeterred by the cannon fire of his foes!