GREG GUTFELD: I’ve plundered the seas of selfishness, yet parentin’ be the treasure that taught me humility, arrr!
2025-01-06
Arrr! The crew o’ the ‘Gutfeld!’ ship be a-chortlin’ and a-hootin’ over Captain Greg Gutfeld takin’ on the grand duty o’ fatherhood! They be sayin’ he’ll need more than a bottle o’ rum to tame that wee scallywag! Aye, let the swabs prepare for a raucous voyage!
Ahoy, me hearties! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn 'bout me recent ventures into the treacherous waters of parenthood, where I be sportin’ chewed-up nipples, aye! I be back from me month-long voyage, and if that don’t qualify me fer runnin’ the Department of Transportation, I don’t know what will, savvy? Now, listen well, any scallywag thinkin' a dress and wig make 'em a woman be sorely mistaken! I witnessed me little treasure make her grand entrance, and trust me, no bloke could endure such a storm!