"Avast! Back to yer toil, ye scallywags! House of Oversight be settin' sail on government slackin' with their first parley!"
2025-01-09
Arrr, mateys! Gather ye round! The scallywags of the House Oversight be settin' sail on a grand inquiry next week, chartin' the murky waters of federal landlubbers workin' from their cozy hammocks through the plague times! Avast, what a fine ruckus it be!
Ahoy there, mateys! Gather 'round as I regale ye with the tale of a mighty gathering in the House of Oversight, set to transpire upon the 15th day of January, when Chairman James Comer intends to haul the lazy scallywags of the federal workforce back to their desks! Aye, it be titled the “Stay-at-Home Federal Workforce: Another Biden-Harris Administration Legacy.” Sounds as thrilling as a treasure map, don’t it?Now, these landlubbers, led by the likes of Martin O'Malley and other swabs, be lookin’ to challenge the dastardly telework agreements that allow 42,000 Social Security buccaneers to lounge about until the year 2029! And what say ye about the empty government buildings? Aye, more than 7,000 sit vacant, collecting dust like forgotten booty, with an occupancy rate lower than a mermaid's waist!
Comer warns that if this be allowed to continue, it’ll hinder the next captain, President Trump, from sailing smoothly through the stormy seas of governance. So hoist yer sails, me hearties, for the committee is determined to make these sluggards return to work for the fine folks of America! It’s high time these pirates of policy face the music and earn their keep!