Arrr! Fox News scroll be sayin’: Rapaport be blastin' the CA captain, while Prince William be makin' a cheeky surprise!
2025-01-18
Arrr, me hearties! The Fox News Treasure Scroll be spillin' the juiciest tales from the Hollywood seas, with gossip o' the glitterin' stars and jolly yarns from Los Angeles and far-flung shores. Brace yerselves for a bellyful o' mirth and mayhem!
Ahoy mateys! Gather 'round fer a jolly tale from the land of Fox News, where the gossip be as rich as a pirate's booty!First up, Michael Rapaport be raisin' a ruckus like a cannon blast at Governor Gavin Newsom, shoutin', “Fire-proof yer land, not just from Trump!” Aye, it seems the fires o’ LA have stirred the pot!
Then we spy Prince William makin' a curious move, treadin' lightly in the royal waters after his kin, Prince Harry and Andrew, risk the throne’s might with their slimmed-down monarchy chatter. The expert on the ship has a keen eye on this one!
Meanwhile, Captain Trump has named some mighty fine buccaneers—Sylvester Stallone, Mel Gibson, and Jon Voight—as special ambassadors to Hollywood’s troubled seas. Arrr, Hollywood be needin’ a hearty crew indeed!
Not to be outdone, HGTV lass Christina Haack finds herself in a courtroom duel with her estranged matey, while Patricia Heaton declares LA fires a harsh lesson, sayin’, “Aye, don’t rely solely on the government!”
In other news, David Schwimmer be servin’ divorce papers like a true pirate, and Justin Baldoni be battlin’ Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds over a treasure chest of gold! Aye, what a tumultuous tide of gossip!