"Arrr, Cap'n Jonathan Turley be sayin' President Biden spies ghostly amendments, like lost treasure in Davy Jones' locker!"
2025-01-18
Arrr, mateys! Lawman Jonathan Turley be laughin' like a scallywag over Captain Biden's grand claim 'bout the Equal Rights Amendment bein' law! Blimey, that ol' parchment be as dead as Davy Jones' locker, havin' sunk ages ago! Aye, it be a fine jape indeed!
Avast ye landlubbers! It seems our Captain Biden be seein' more ghosts than a shipwrecked sailor on a full moon! Just before he sailed into the sunset of his term, he claimed there be a 28th Amendment floatin' 'round, despite it bein' as lifeless as a sunken treasure chest! Aye, this be a moment not unlike that ghastly flick, "The Sixth Sense," where Biden, like young Cole Sear, thinks he sees amendments walkin' the decks, unaware of their cold, dead state!He made this tall tale to please the crew of the radical left, shoutin' that the Equal Rights Amendment be now part of the great law o' the land! Yet, much like a ship without a rudder, this proclamation has no legal bearing. Even the keeper of the scrolls, Archivist Shogan, said she can’t publish what be already sank to Davy Jones' locker. So, what’s a pirate to do when his treasure map leads to ghostly shores? Aye, Biden thought he could wield the power of Caesar with a mere declaration!
But alas, the truth be as grim as a kraken's grip. The ERA be as dead as a parrot, and Biden's attempt to resurrect it be but a farce. Mayhaps he sees these dead amendments not as lost causes, but as the remnants of his legacy. Either way, both be headin' to the land of the forgotten! Yarrr!