"Arrr, matey! John Yoo be sayin' Trump should hoist the TikTok sails right off the bat, savvy?"
2025-01-20
Arrr, matey! 'Tis the duty o' Captain Trump to guard the treasure of the realm! Yonder TikTok be a slippery fish he must wrangle whilst sailin' the seas of national security. Aye, even a scallywag needs his dance moves to keep the crew entertained!
Ahoy mateys, gather 'round and lend me yer ear! It be said that TikTok, that scallywag of a social media beast, poses a dire threat to the good ol’ U.S. of A. Congress be squawkin' that the Chinese crown can spy on a whopping 170 million American buccaneers through this app, and lo, the Supreme Court has ruled that the 2024 Protecting Americans from Foreign Adversary Controlled Applications Act be sound as a ship's hull!But hark! Rumor has it that the Trump crew be plannin' to drop an executive order that’d put the law on hold fer 90 days, lookin' fer a plunderous deal to save TikTok. Yet, here lies the rub: the sands of time be slippin’ through the hourglass, and the law’s deadline be tickin' away like a cannonball to a pirate’s heart! TikTok must either find a buyer or walk the plank before Trump dons his captain’s hat on January 20, 2025.
With universities and states watchin’ like hawks, the fine fer violatin’ this law could sink ships—up to $5,000 per user! So, while the Trump fleet may seek to chart a course through these choppy waters, it be clear that only Congress holds the compass to regulate commerce with foreign nations. Aye, if they don't heed the call, they may find themselves swimmin' with the fishes!