Arrr, matey! Amazon be a scurvy scallywag, makin' it as difficult to cancel as walkin' the plank. The FTC be takin' 'em to court, arr! Here be the tale.
2023-07-06
Avast, me hearties! As Amazon Prime Day be approachin', ye scurvy dogs be wonderin' how ye be gettin' yerselves trapped in the clutches of this costly membership. Fear not, me mateys! Here be a jolly guide on cancelin' without the pain in yer noggin'.
In the language of a 17th-century pirate, let's talk about what Amazon knows about ye, matey! Not just yer favorite shampoo or yer dog's grub, but everything they know about ye! Arr! If ye be wantin' a copy of all that information, ye can use this here link to get it.Now, let's set sail to the treacherous waters of the Amazon Clinic. Is it safe to use, ye ask? Well, prepare to be shocked! Here be me take on the matter.
But that's not all, me hearties! There be the matter of Amazon Prime. If ye ever tried to cancel yer Prime membership, ye know it's like takin' the SATs! The scallywags at Amazon made it intentionally confusin'. Let's take a closer look at what ye get with Prime, whether it be worth it, and how to cancel if it ain't the right fit fer ye.
Now, here be an operation ye might not have heard of before. The Federal Trade Commission claims that Amazon hid its schemes from the feds! They say Amazon execs delayed or even rejected changes that would've made cancellin' easier. And why, ye ask? 'Cause they wanted to reduce cancellations, savvy? The process be a confusin' maze, with deals and distractions to keep ye from abandonin' ship. They even gave it a fancy codename, "Iliad Flow," like somethin' out of a legendary epic.
But let's talk about the benefits of Prime, me hearties! If ye be a frequent shopper on Amazon and enjoy the extras like Prime Video, it might be worth the $139 a year or $14.99 a month. But if ye only shop a few times a month and don't care about the extras, the free shipping might not be worth the cost of the membership.
And fear not, me mateys, if ye only be sailin' the Amazon waters every now and then, ye can get a free 30-day trial of Prime. Just sign up for a monthly membership and remember to cancel when ye be done.
Now, if ye be lookin' to abandon ship and cancel yer Prime membership, ye can do it on yer computer or smartphone. Here be the instructions, step by step. And once ye be done, ye can rest easy knowin' ye have escaped the clutches of Prime.
So there ye have it, me hearties! Amazon knows more about ye than ye might think. But whether ye choose to stay aboard the Prime ship or abandon it, the choice be yours. Fair winds and happy shoppin'!