Arrr, 'tis a tale of scurvy scallywags! DeSantis-aligned mateys be seekin' a grand sum o' $50 million doubloons from donors on a day of thar first GOP brawl, as revealed by leaked audio!
2023-08-31
Avast ye, ye wealthy Republicans! 'Tis an urgent plea from the top brass of the super PAC supportin' Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis! They be beggin' for a jolly sum of $50 million in the next four months, and a grand total of $100 million by March's end. A leaked audio obtained by CNN tells the tale, mateys!
In a jolly appeal to the wealthy Republicans who had gathered in Milwaukee afore the first GOP presidential primary debate, the high-ranking officers for the super PAC supporting the gallant Florida Governor Ron DeSantis pleaded for their assistance in a most urgent manner. As reported by CNN, the leaked audio revealed the Never Back Down CEO, Chris Jankowski, beseeching these noble donors to provide a generous sum of $50 million over the course of the next four moons. But that was not all, dear souls! The audacious demand did not cease there, for Jankowski also implored his comrades to procure a further $100 million ere the arrival of March's end.Oh, what a spectacle it must have been, as these well-off patrons mulled over Jankowski's audacious proposition! The super PAC's top brass, recognizing the cruciality of financial backing, knew the stakes were high as they sought to bolster Governor DeSantis' campaign coffers. The leaked audio captured the fervent plea, as Jankowski, with great eloquence, explained the need for such a grand sum, stirring the hearts of those present.
Alas, dear readers, we must ponder the fate of Never Back Down's endeavors. Will these wealthy Republicans answer the call and bless the super PAC with their abundant fortunes? Only time, that fickle mistress, will reveal the outcome of this entreaty. Yet, the stakes are high, and the pressure on Governor DeSantis' campaign is undeniable. With the primary debate looming near, the urgency to amass funds is undeniable, and the super PAC must rely on the generosity of these noble donors to see their cause prevail.