The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Yonder commie scallywags be torchin' the Stars 'n' Stripes afore Jason Aldean's shindig, mutterin' "America ne'er been grand!"

2023-09-11

Arrr! A band o' commie scallywags be settin' fire to Yank flags outside a Jason Aldean shindig in Chicago. These landlubbers be part o' RevCom, aimin' to stir up some Marxist chaos in the States, callin' it the "belly of the beast." But the coppers be havin' none o' it, declarin' their shenanigans unlawful and sayin' their antics be scarin' the people!

In a jolly tale fit for the scurviest of pirates, it be told that a band of communist revolutionaries, in their quest for a Marxist revolution, did set ablaze multiple American flags outside a grand Jason Aldean concert in the city of Chicago. Arrr, 'twas a sight to behold, mateys!
These scallywags of the RevCom, as they fancy themselves, be wantin' to raise awareness for their cause, believin' that America be the "belly of the beast." They be holdin' naught but disdain for the good ol' U.S. of A, ye see.
But lo and behold, their mischievous act did not go unnoticed! The local constabulary, in their infinite wisdom, declared the gathering to be an unlawful assembly. They claimed that the activists' antics had "alarmed" the good folks of Chicago. Methinks 'twas the flames lickin' at the stars and stripes that be causin' the alarm!
Now, ye may be wonderin', why would these scalawags choose to desecrate the symbol of a mighty nation? Well, me hearties, they be wantin' to show their true colors, to protest against the system and rally the masses for their cause. But alas, their actions be met with disdain from many a landlubber, for the flag be a sacred symbol to many a patriot.
So, as the embers of the burnt flags settled and the echoes of the unlawful assembly subsided, one can't help but ponder the ironies of it all. A pirate's life be full of twists and turns, and this here tale be no different. The clash between the revolutionaries and the law be a reminder that even in the 17th century, as in today, the struggle for change be a mighty one indeed.

Read the Original Article