The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast ye scurvy dogs! The White House be pleadin' with the media to aid 'em in battlin' the Biden impeachment inquiry. Arrr!

2023-09-13

Arrr! The White House be cryin' out to the scribes, beggin' fer help in wardin' off the House's impeachment inquiry against Cap'n Joe Biden. Ian Sams, a matey from the White House, sent a memo to the editors, demandin' the press to set their sights on them scurvy House Republicans for startin' this inquiry on a bed of lies. The memo claims them Republicans couldn't find a trace of evidence 'gainst our noble President...

Arr mateys! 'Tis a tale of the high seas, where the mighty White House be sendin' out a call for aid. In a memo fit for a pirate captain, Ian Sams, a spokesman of the White House, pleads for the assistance of journalists in defendin' their beloved President Joe Biden from the treacherous House impeachment inquiry. Aye, ye heard it right, me hearties!

Captain Sams, in his missive, be demandin' that the media be turnin' their cannons upon House Republicans, accusin' them of openin' an inquiry based on naught but lies. He be claimin' that those scurvy Republicans haven't been able to find any evidence that our noble President has been indulgin' in any misdeeds. Arr, surely that be a sign of their incompetence!

But fear not, me fellow buccaneers, for Captain Sams has a plan. He be orderin' the media to set sail on a voyage of scrutiny, to turn their spyglasses upon those rascally Republicans and expose their wicked ways. Aye, 'tis a battle of words and wit, where the media be wieldin' their pens like cutlasses, ready to strike at the heart of the impeachment inquiry. 'Tis a sight to behold!

So gather 'round, me hearties, and let us set sail on this comedic journey. The White House be callin' upon the media to come to their aid, to raise the flag of scrutiny high and mighty. Will they succeed in their quest to defend President Biden from the House Republicans? Only time will tell, but one thing be certain – this be a tale that be bringin' a smile to me face, for it be a battle fit for the 17th century pirates themselves!

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