Avast ye mateys! Set yer peepers on this frightful tale o' how Neuralink's monkeys met their untimely demise.
2023-09-20
Avast, ye scallywags! Elon Musk be spoutin' that no monkeys be pushin' up daisies from Neuralink's gizmos. But listen 'ere, mateys! A WIRED investigation be divulgin' the gruesome truth of their demise, and the good ol' US authorities be called to probe Musk's bold talk! Ahoy!
In a statement that sounds more like a declaration from a swashbuckling pirate of the 17th century, Elon Musk boldly proclaimed that no primates met their demise due to Neuralink's implants. However, an investigation conducted by WIRED magazine has now uncovered the gruesome details surrounding these alleged primate casualties. As a result, US authorities have been urged to look into the veracity of Musk's claims.Picture this: a daring entrepreneur with a penchant for eccentricity, donning a tricorn hat and brandishing an electronic parrot on his shoulder, insists that no harm befell any primate during his grandiose experiment. But alas, the investigation reveals that the reality is far more macabre.
With the seriousness befitting an investigation of this nature, the authorities have been called upon to delve into the dark abyss of Musk's claims. Did these primates truly escape the clutches of death unscathed, or were they unfortunate victims of this audacious scientific endeavor?
It seems that Musk's flamboyant assertions may have been nothing more than a smokescreen, a clever ploy to divert attention from the somber fate that befell our primate companions. The investigation has peered behind the curtain, exposing the grisly specifics of their demise.
Now, the stage is set, and the US authorities have been beckoned to take center stage. Will they uncover the truth, or will it be buried beneath layers of Musk's charismatic charm? Only time will tell.
So, as we wait for the final act to unfold, let us remember the poor primates who unwittingly became entangled in this technological drama. May their sacrifice serve as a cautionary tale, a reminder that even the most audacious endeavors can have dire consequences. And, of course, let us hope that authorities will shed light on the truth, bringing an end to this tantalizing mystery.