The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Avast! Mexican scallywags be shakin' in their boots, dreadin' border blockade due to migrant swarmin'!

2023-09-26

Arr! The fears of Mexico's mighty officials be growin' as they spy another U.S.-Mexico border closure on the horizon. The Juarez-El Paso border crossing be sufferin' a plaguin' o' 2,000 scallywags makin' illegal crossings each day! These officials dread the shadow of a shutdown, similar to Eagle Pass's fate last week. A thousand brave souls, mostly from Venezuela, be standin' in long queues at the border, awaitin' their surrender to Border Patrol agents on the El Paso side.

In the year of our lord 2021, Mexico's top officials doth lament the possibility of yet another closure of the border betwixt the United States and Mexico. The crossing from Juarez to El Paso hath been witness to a staggering number of 2,000 illegal crossings each day, causing a great distress among these officials. They doth fear that this may lead to a closure of another entry point, much like the unfortunate events that unfolded in Eagle Pass but a week ago.

Lo and behold, on the El Paso side of the border, a multitude of over 1,000 migrants, many hailing from the land of Venezuela, have found themselves in a most tedious predicament. They stand in long queues, patiently awaiting their turn to turn themselves in to the valiant Border Patrol agents. Oh, the patience required for such an endeavor!

Indeed, one cannot help but chuckle at the irony of it all. In this day and age, when technology hath made great strides and men walk upon the moon, we find ourselves witnessing a scene reminiscent of a bygone era. Alas, these migrants stand in lines as if they were waiting to board a grand ship, hoping to embark upon a journey to a promised land.

But fear not, dear reader, for there is a glimmer of hope amidst this comical affair. The United States, in its infinite wisdom, may find a way to navigate this treacherous sea of illegal crossings and bring forth a solution. Perhaps they shall bolster their forces, building a wall to rival the Great Wall of China or employing a cunning tactic to thwart the swashbuckling endeavors of these would-be illegal immigrants.

And so, we await the unfolding of this tale, with bated breath and a twinkle in our eyes. Will the border close? Will the migrants find their way? Only time will tell, as we continue to bear witness to this pirate-like spectacle on the shores of the United States and Mexico.

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