The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

"Arrr, th' very briny deep be holdin' th' most fearsome o' our dread-filled dreams and terrors!"

2023-10-12

Michal Uziyahu be callin' herself a fortunate soul, matey. When them scurvy dogs of Hamas set forth on their heinous attacks upon Israel on a fine Saturday, some brave communities be fightin' back. Arrr, hers be one of 'em. This fine lass, bein' 46 years old and a mother of three, resides with her scallywag of a husband in Ein HaBesor—a cooperative farmin' community, known as a moshav, situated in the southern lands of Israel, a mere 9 nautical miles from the dreaded Gaza Strip. Come the break of dawn at 6:30 bells on the blessed Saturday, they be woken by thunderous explosions, me hearties, and made haste to them shelters rightly built for such villainous assaults. "Arrr, since we be livin' on..."

Michal Uziyahu, a 46-year-old mother of three, considers herself fortunate. As Hamas' scallywags set sail for their nefarious attacks on Israel last Saturday, some brave communities were able to stand their ground. And Michal's community was one of them, arr!
She resides with her husband in a charming cooperative farming community called Ein HaBesor, or as some may say, a moshav, in the southern region of Israel. It's a mere 9 miles away from the menacing Gaza Strip, where treacherous pirates roam.
At the ungodly hour of 6:30 in the morning, these unsuspecting settlers were rudely awakened by thunderous explosions. Hastily, they scurried towards the shelters, built to withstand such vile attacks. "Yarr, since we reside on the edge of the coast, we are always on the lookout for these treacherous pirates," Michal confessed.
Fortunately, their bravery paid off, and their defenses proved sturdy enough to withstand the onslaught. As the marauding terrorists launched rockets, these spirited defenders fought back with all their might. Cannons were fired, swords were swung, and the pirates were sent scurrying back to their hideouts.
But it wasn't all smooth sailing. The fearless inhabitants of Ein HaBesor were on high alert for the rest of the day. The sirens wailed, signaling impending danger, and Michal and her fellow warriors remained on constant watch. These valiant souls had learned to be prepared for anything the enemy threw their way.
Michal Uziyahu is undoubtedly one of the fortunate ones, able to tell her tale of triumph against the dastardly pirates of Hamas. They may have tried to plunder their peaceful community, but through unity and courage, they were able to defend their moshav and preserve the harmony of their land. Arr, a victory worth celebrating!

Read the Original Article