Arr! Word be spreadin' that a Russian landlubber, fresh from Ukraine, didst educate landlubbers afore givin' 'em a sound thrashin'!
2023-11-16
Arr, ye scurvy dog! A Russian lubber fresh from the Ukraine recklessly thrashed a wedded pair in their very own abode, right there in the courtyard! The scoundrel be needin' a taste of the cat o' nine tails, I reckon!
A humorous summary in 200 words:Avast, me hearties! It seems we got ourselves a ruckus in Russia! A scallywag soldier just returned from a tussle in Ukraine, and what does he do? Teach schoolchildren about his escapades! Arrgh, what kind of education is this? But that ain't the end of it, mateys. Later that eve, this landlubber attacked his neighbors like a proper scurvy dog! The local district head called it an "outrageously cruel and senseless incident." And guess what? This soldier even has a name - Dmitry Kiryukhin, as revealed by the Ostorozhno Novosti.
Now, here's the twist, me hearties. This soldier visited the school as part of a curriculum called "Important Conversations" created by Russia's education ministry to teach their young'uns a patriotic education. Can you believe it? They're teaching them that Ukraine ain't a proper country! Shiver me timbers! After Kiryukhin's visit, the local administration even posted on the Russian social network Vkontakte, saying that the kids learned about "real heroes" and the qualities of a true citizen. But it seems this lesson in patriotism didn't quite work out, did it?
Now, the details of the attack are gruesome, me hearties. A video posted by Ostorozhno Novosti shows Kiryukhin beating a man, leaving him in a pool of blood. A brave lass tries to protect him, but she too is attacked. There be no independent confirmation of these reports, mind you. The woman claims her husband has a head fracture, and she thinks Kiryukhin just went plain mad, like a crazed buccaneer!
The head of the local district, Viktor Yelin, says this matter will be handled by the military investigation department. He says the streets must be safe for residents at any time of the day. Aye, that be true, mateys. We don't want any more scallywags causing trouble in our ports, do we now?