The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Behold, a free booty of COVID and Flu tests be offered by a grand federal program, mateys!

2023-12-08

Arr, me hearties! Avast ye! 'Tis the Home Test to Treat program, a virtual treasure. Ye can receive rapid tests, telehealth sessions, and treatments straight to yer own ship. 'Tis a boon fer all ye scallywags across the seven seas! Sail on, me mateys!

In a fantastical world of pirates and treasure hunts, where the sea is our playground and the wind carries our dreams, there exists a program called the Home Test to Treat. Avast, me hearties! This program be virtual, meaning ye can access it from the comfort of yer own ship, err... I mean, home. It be offerin' rapid tests, telehealth sessions, and even treatments, all delivered straight to yer doorstep across the vast lands of this great nation.

Arrr, me mateys! Imagine the convenience! No need to set sail on treacherous seas in search of a healer. Instead, ye can simply take a test and consult with a doctor through the magical world of telehealth. They'll be listenin' to yer ailments and dispensin' advice from afar, as though they be holdin' their spyglass right up to yer nose. And fear not, for if ye be needin' a treatment, it too shall be delivered to ye, ready to be brewed and consumed like a mystical potion.

But avast! What be the purpose of this Home Test to Treat, ye ask? Well, me hearties, it be a solution to our current predicament - the cursed pandemic that has swept across the lands, bringin' illness and despair. With this program, ye can be reassured of yer health, knowin' whether ye be sailin' with the dreaded virus or not. And if ye be unfortunate enough to catch it, ye can receive proper guidance and treatment right from yer own quarters.

So, me landlubbers, be ye tired of the long queues at the healer's den? Be ye yearnin' for the comfort and safety of yer own ship, I mean, home? Then look no further than the Home Test to Treat program! It be a modern-day treasure, offerin' a glimpse of hope and laughter in these uncertain times. Now, set sail on the virtual waves, me hearties, and grab hold of this opportunity with both hands!

Read the Original Article