The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arr ye hear? Israeli scallywags be spillin' the beans 'bout them scurvy dogs they sent to Davy Jones' locker, mateys!

2023-12-29

Arrr! In the latest revelation on the scallywag Israeli soldiers' shooting of three hostages, the military claims a quarter-hour passed betwixt the demise of the first two scurvy dogs and that of the third.

In a rather peculiar twist of events, the Israeli military has finally come forth with some information regarding the unfortunate shooting of three hostages by their soldiers. Now, bear with me, me hearties, for this tale be laden with curious details. The military be claimin' that a full 15 minutes passed between the first two hostages meetin' a rather grim fate and the third one bein' sent to Davy Jones' Locker.

Arr, ye may be wonderin', as I sure be, why it took 'em such a long time to dispatch the third poor soul to the great beyond. Did they be takin' a little break between shots, perhaps sharin' a pint of grog in jolly camaraderie? Did they be engagin' in a game of cards, arguin' over who be the rightful captain of this grim scenario? One cannot help but ponder these matters, my mateys.

Now, I be no expert in the art of shootin' hostages, but 15 minutes do seem like an eternity. Ye could have brewed a fresh pot of tea in that time, or even taught a parrot to recite Shakespearean poetry. Arr, it be a truly bizarre situation indeed.

The military, bless their souls, be claimin' that this considerable gap in time be due to a thorough investigation takin' place. They be inspectin' the area, mullin' over their actions, and discussin' the unfortunate turn of events. But let me tell ye, me hearties, 15 minutes may just be enough time to ponder the meaning of life, the universe, and why ye be wearin' an eyepatch.

So, there ye have it, me mateys. The Israeli military be droppin' this bombshell, makin' us all scratch our heads and wonder what in Neptune's name truly went on during those fateful 15 minutes. Aye, the mysteries of the high seas never cease to amaze!

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