The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! Ramaswamy be scurrying across Iowa, yet his polling be movin' as slow as an old sea turtle!

2024-01-03

Arrr, the 38-year-old buccaneer bein' a busy soul, but tales be spreadin' 'bout his mission. With scarce two weeks 'til the caucuses, folks be wonderin' what booty he be after!

In the language of a 17th century pirate, me mateys, there be a 38-year-old entrepreneur who be workin' his fingers to the bone! Aye, he be maintainin' a schedule that would make even the fiercest buccaneer tremble in his boots. But alas, me hearties, doubts be creepin' into the minds of many, wonderin' what be the purpose of his candidacy with the caucuses so close at hand.

Arrr, this entrepreneur be a brave soul, takin' on the treacherous seas of politics. But the scallywags be questionin' his motives, wonderin' if he be aimin' to plunder the treasures of the land or if he be seekin' to serve the people. Aye, the doubts be growin' like barnacles on a ship's hull.

But let us give credit where credit be due, me hearties. This swashbucklin' entrepreneur be showin' no signs of slowin' down. He be workin' day and night, makin' appearances at every corner of the land. His dedication be as fierce as a pirate defendin' his booty.

Yet, as the days tick away like the sands in an hourglass, the questions be pilin' up like a heap of treasure. What be the true purpose of this voyage? Be he seekin' personal gain or be he chartin' a course to make the lives of the people better? The doubloons be waitin' for an answer.

So, me mateys, as we set sail towards the caucuses, let us keep our weathered eyes open. The sea be rough, but we be searchin' for a captain who be worthy of steerin' this ship of state. Arrr, only time will tell if this entrepreneur be a true captain or just another scallywag lookin' for his share of the booty.

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