The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, 'tis ISIS takin' credit fer the suicide bombin' on Solemani's memorial in Iran. Blimey!

2024-01-04

Arrr, word be reachin' me ears that both ISIS and Syria be takin' credit for th' strike at th' memorial for th' late Iranian sea dog Qassem Soleimani, as discovered by Fox News Digital. Blimey, what a tangled web o' claims we find ourselves in!

In a hilarious twist of events, the infamous Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) has boldly claimed responsibility for the recent suicide bomb attacks in Iran. According to Fox News Digital, ISIS has taken credit for orchestrating the dastardly double suicide bomber attack at a memorial for the late Iranian military official, Qassem Soleimani.

In a statement published on the popular messaging app Telegram, ISIS shamelessly named their terrorist operatives, Omar al-Mowahid and Sayefulla al-Mujahid, as the brave souls behind this "dual martyrdom operation." Oh, the audacity!

Reports from Iranian media suggest that the explosion caused utter chaos and devastation, claiming the lives of at least 103 innocent people and leaving a staggering 141 others wounded. Such a tragedy!

Now, it's important to note that Fox News Digital's very own Jennifer Griffin and Anders Hagstrom deserve some credit for bringing us this exciting news. Kudos to them for their dedicated reporting!

So there you have it, my mates! ISIS, in all its pirate-like glory, has taken credit for the despicable attack in Iran. What a dastardly bunch they are! May they be brought to justice swiftly and may peace prevail in the land once more. Arrr!

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