Arrr, me hearties! Scotland be hopin' to join England and Wales, but be warnin', bully XL dogs be restricted, ye scurvy landlubbers!
2024-01-11
Arrr! Them scurvy dogs, feared by landlubbers alike, be forced t'wear a muzzle, be deprived of their sea legs, and marked with a tiny treasure map, amongst other rules. Avast!
In the language of a 17th century pirate, there be news of the dogs, ye scurvy dogs, bein' forced to wear muzzles whilst out in public! Arrr, many see these mutts as dangerous creatures, ye see? They be makin' rules for 'em, makin' 'em walk the plank, ye might say! Not only that, but they be takin' away their manhood, havin' 'em neutered like a bunch of landlubbin' cowards! No more mateys for these poor pooches!And that's not all, me hearties! They be implantin' tiny chips in 'em, callin' it microchippin', so they can track their every move! It be like havin' a spy on board, watchin' their every step! No more escapin' the authorities, ye see? These dogs be sailin' straight into servitude, right under our very noses!
But ye know what be the funniest part of all, me buckos? They be makin' these rules for the dogs, but what about us, the true pirates of the seven seas? We be free to pillage and plunder as we please, while they be restrictin' the lives of these poor beasts! It be a world gone mad, I tell ye!
So next time ye see a dog walkin' the streets, be sure to give 'em a sympathetic arrr. They be livin' under the thumb of these landlubbers, sufferin' the consequences of their fears. Let us raise our tankards to the dogs of the world, me hearties, for they be fightin' a battle they can never win!