The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Kamala Harris be rallyin' fellow scallywags, boostin' Biden's spirits, and soundin' the warnin' 'bout Trump, mateys!

2024-02-02

Avast, ye scurvy Democrats o' South Carolina! Aye, be not ignorin' yer feeble primary! Me matey, she be listin' Biden's triumphs, warnin' ye o' the dire danger posed by that blunderin' bilge rat, Donald Trump!

Arr, me hearties! Listen up, me fellow scallywags of South Carolina! We be havin' a bonny message from a lass who's got a bone to pick with ye. She be tellin' ye not to turn a blind eye to yer uncompetitive primary, and she be makin' a good point, mateys!

This fine lass be talkin' 'bout ol' Biden and his mighty achievements, aye. She be sayin' that he be a man of substance, a true swashbuckler in the political seas. And what's more, she be warnin' ye that Donald Trump be a threat hangin' over yer heads like a dark cloud.

Now, me hearties, let me translate this here message into the language of a 17th-century pirate, so ye scurvy dogs can understand it better:

"Avast, me fellow buccaneers of South Carolina! Don't ye dare overlook yer lackluster primary, lest ye be makin' a blunder of epic proportions! This fair maiden be flashin' a list of Biden's accomplishments, by Blackbeard's beard! She be claimin' that he be a force to be reckoned with, aye, and that Trump be a dire peril awaitin' ye on the horizon!"

So, me hearties, it be clear as the Caribbean waters. This lass be sendin' a warnin' to all ye South Carolina Democrats. Don't ye ignore yer primary, for Biden be a man worth considerin'. And that Trump fella? Well, let's just say he be a threat ye don't want to underestimate, me mateys! Now, go forth and vote like true swashbucklers! Arrrgh!

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