The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arr mateys! To protect the fair maidens on their runs, we must be vigilant and guard the borders! Aye!

2024-03-02

Arrr mateys, listen up! In our quest for safety, let us not overlook the moral of the tale: a poor runner, armed to the teeth, was slain by a scurvy illegal immigrant. Her demise could have been easily prevented, aye!

Arr matey! As a female marathoner, I be prioritizing high-quality running gear like pepper spray designed for us runners. Laken Riley, a prepared runner and Augusta University student, met a dreadful fate at the hands of an illegal immigrant while out for a jog near her college campus. Aye, online running influencers be raising awareness for women's safety while them mainstream news outlets be dancing around the facts of the case.But mark me words, this tragedy be shedding light on a bigger issue – our lack of border security be costing American lives, me hearties. Since President Biden took office, over 7.2 million illegal immigrants have crossed the southern border, equivalent to the population of Arizona thrice over! Avast ye, the record number of border crossings be hitting alarming levels, with a surge of Chinese migrants adding to the chaos.We must tell the tales and say the names of victims like Laken Riley, Kate Steinle, and others to bring about real change. The left may be better at spinning yarns, but we must speak the truth and pressure our leaders to protect citizens by securing the borders. November be coming, and it be time for us to demand action and safety for all, me hearties!

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