The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, the UK official be walkin' the plank fer falsely accusing a scholar of supportin' them scallywags of Hamas!

2024-03-06

Arrr, ye scallywag Michelle Donelan be walkin' the plank after accusin' a learned professor of sympathizin' with the likes of Hamas! She be payin' a hefty sum to make amends, but methinks she'll be keepin' a weather eye on her accusations from now on. Aye, the seas be treacherous for those who speak without thinkin'!

Ahoy mateys! 'Tis a tale of scandal and apology in the British lands, where a Cabinet minister hath been forced to walk the plank and pay damages to a professor accused of sympathizing with the likes of Hamas, a band of scallywags deemed terrorists in the kingdom.Science Secretary Michelle Donelan hath admitted her wrongdoing, confessing there be "no evidence" that the professor, Kate Sang, be in cahoots with the dastardly Hamas. She hath apologized and shelled out a bounty of public funds to make amends.Donelan had raised her Jolly Roger to the public body U.K. Research and Innovation, demanding the removal of Sang and another academic from their posts for allegedly supporting the enemy. But alas, the investigation found no evidence of such treachery.Sang, who had set sail for a libel action, be pleased with the outcome but be not a happy camper with the minister's behavior. She plans to share some of the booty with charity, a noble deed indeed.So, me hearties, let this be a lesson to all who accuse without proof, for in the end, the truth shall prevail, and the doubloons shall be paid to the wronged. Yo ho ho!

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