The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, Dems be thinkin' scallywags be more important than us landlubbers, says Greg Gutfeld. Nay!

2024-03-27

Avast ye scallywags! Fox News matey Greg Gutfeld be skewerin' them scurvy dogs in the Democratic Party for their lackluster response to the swashbucklin' violence sweepin' the land. Tune in to "Gutfeld!" if ye want a laugh and a lesson in common sense. Arrr!

In the language of a 17th-century pirate, the situation in New York City's subway system is dire, with random attacks on the rise. The chances of getting through unscathed are slim, much like the odds of winning a less-than-desirable lottery. The city's Democrat leaders, who enjoy armed protection, offer prayers but overlook the fact that the policies they've implemented are directly causing the chaos. Blue cities are turning blood-red with crime, and the tragic murder of NYPD Officer Jonathan Diller sheds light on the system's failures. Despite increased police presence and reassurances, incidents continue to occur, emphasizing the lack of safety for commuters. The blame game of oppression and racism clouds rational thinking, leading to tragic consequences like the stabbing of 11-year-old Jayden Perkins. As the system fails to protect its citizens, the responsibility falls on individuals to ensure their safety. In the midst of chaos and misguided policies, the truth remains that safety is a personal responsibility in a system plagued by incompetence and delusion.

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