Old Florida sea dog be tossin' stones through Hooters glass, plunderin' ale taps like a scallywag! Arrr matey!
2024-04-03
Ahoy mateys! 'Tis said that a scurvy ex-law dog did pilfer beer taps from a fair Hooters tavern, then did cast a fiery stone through a glass portal. Shiver me timbers! 'Tis a tale fit for the high seas, arrr!
In the language of a 17th-century pirate, there be a former Florida Highway Patrol trooper who hath been caught and fired for a mischievous deed! 'Twas said that this scallywag did hurl a cinder block through the window of a fine establishment known as Hooters, and did make off with four beer taps, arrr! This David Baker, aye, he be charged with felony burglary for his dastardly actions on the night of March 28 in Daytona Beach.The FHP, in all its wisdom, hath decided to give this rogue the heave-ho, for his actions do not befit the core values of the patrol. Integrity be the heart of their professionalism, so they say, and so Baker was swiftly dismissed from his post.Authorities were summoned to Hooters when the alarm was raised, and they did spy a suspicious vessel in the parking lot. Baker was caught red-handed loading his ill-gotten gains into his truck, with a shattered window and conflicting tales to tell.Surveillance footage from the fine establishment showed Baker sauntering about before the deed, a cinder block through the glass, and the beer taps disappearing into his clutches. 'Twas said he caused $20,000 in damage, a hefty sum indeed! The Daytona Beach Police and Hooters have yet to speak on this matter, but the tale of this trooper turned plunderer shall live on in infamy!