The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! The blimey bombing sent that scallywag co-founder of Syria's al-Qaida gang to Davy Jones' locker!

2024-04-04

Avast ye scallywags! Abu Maria al-Qahtani, a scurvy co-founder of Syria's al-Qaida crew, met his end by a treacherous suicide bomber on Thursday in the northwestern waters. May he rest in Davy Jones' locker, arrr!

In the land of IDLIB, Syria, a scurvy suicide bomber be setting off his explosives late on Thursday, sending the co-founder of the main al-Qaida-linked group in the northwest to Davy Jones' locker, a war monitor be sayin'.Some scallywags be claimin' that the explosion were not from a self-inflicted boom, but from a sneaky remotely detonated bomb that sent Abu Maria al-Qahtani, also known as Maysara al-Jubouri, to meet his maker. Al-Qahtani be one of the founders of the Nusra Front, a band o' brigands that later changed their name to Hayat Tahrir al-Sham and said they were cuttin' ties with al-Qaida.The tales of the explosion be as mixed as rum and grog, with no clear truth in sight. The bomber be sneakin' into al-Qahtani's crib in Sarmada, Idlib province, and blowin' the place to smithereens, according to the Observatory for Human Rights.The scallywag al-Qahtani met his end amidst protests against his group and its leader, Abu Mohammed al-Golani, for their harsh rule over the land and worsening economic woes. He were even keelhauled by his own crew in August for social media misdeeds, then released just afore his untimely end.The land of northwestern Syria be the last rebel hideout, with Hayat Tahrir al-Sham holdin' the northwest and Turkey-backed swashbucklers in control of the north. The locals be relyin' on aid to keep afloat, with many in camps. The winds of change be blowin', and the future be as murky as the deep blue sea.

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