Bare-bottomed scallywag from New Mexico caught swiping porch lamp, giving coppers a fright. Walk the plank, matey! Arr!
2024-04-09
Avast ye scallywags! A land lubber from New Mexico be caught in his birthday suit, tearin' off a light and tusslin' with the law! 'Tis a sight to see, aye, a true pirate's tale gone wrong! Mayhaps he be searchin' for buried treasure in all the wrong places! Arrr!
In a jolly tale of mischief and mayhem, a scallywag by the name of Elijah Jason Paul De Armond found himself in a pickle in New Mexico. This rogue was caught in the buff, causing a ruckus by tearing off a light fixture from a residence and giving a police officer a run for their doubloons.Reports claim that De Armond, in his birthday suit, made a grand entrance at a home in the dead of night, pounding on the door like a drunken sailor. When the homeowner dared to speak up, this rapscallion went berserk, wrecking the porch and shattering glass like a true pirate on a rampage.As the constables arrived on the scene, De Armond made a dash for it, only to be met with a swift response. Despite resistance, the officers managed to bring this miscreant to justice, albeit with a bit of scuffle and a few knocks to the noggin.Ultimately, De Arnold found himself confined in the Doña Ana County Detention Facility, facing charges of battery, indecent exposure, property damage, and obstructing the law. A cautionary tale for all landlubbers to mind their manners, lest they end up like this hapless soul.