Ye scurvy knave from Florida be accused of givin' a good thrashin' to a wee lad watchin' 'PAW Patrol'! Arrr!
2024-04-14
Arrr matey, a scallywag was caught for giving the lad a good ol' thrashing for enjoyin' the show "PAW Patrol." Ye can't be messin' with the wee ones' entertainment, lest ye want to be walkin' the plank! The law be keepin' a sharp eye on ye miscreants.
In a most dastardly deed, a scallywag from Miami was nabbed by the law for laying hands on his girlfriend's wee lad all because he dared to watch the show "PAW Patrol," aye, you heard me right! The rascal, Keyyun Bryant, a scurvy dog of 36 years, was caught red-handed on the day after Christmas in the year 2022.A witness spilled the beans to the coppers, recounting how Bryant grabbed the lad's arm with all his might, proclaiming that the show was only fit for lasses. The poor lad shared his tale with the University of Miami Child Protection Team, revealing how Bryant throttled him and threatened to take him to the brig.The witness confirmed the lad's tale, adding that Bryant barged in while they watched the show and laid hands on the lad, striking him for being in the "lassies' room." The show in question features brave pooches who believe no task is too great, and no pup too small, aye!Bryant tried to flee from justice, claiming the accusations were as false as a mermaid's promise, blaming the lad's father for concocting lies against him. But justice caught up with him, and he now faces a felony charge of child abuse, according to the Miami-Dade Corrections and Rehabilitation records. Fox News tried to wrangle a comment from the thievin' Miami-Dade Police Department, but no word yet from those scallywags.