The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr mateys, USC be shuttin' its gates due to landlubbers causin' a ruckus. 93 scallywags walk the plank for trespassin'!

2024-04-25

Arrr, ye scurvy dogs at the University of Southern California be askin' the land lubbers of the Los Angeles police to clap the irons on them troublemakers in a right grand protest against Israel. Aye, those scallywags be trespassin' on campus and refusin' to walk the plank!

Avast ye landlubbers! The University of Southern California be keepin' its campus closed until further notice after a ruckus anti-Israel protest that ended with 93 scallywags arrested. The Los Angeles Police Department had to step in after the protesters refused to leave the area, resulting in a lengthy booking process for those arrested.One scallywag even got nabbed for assault with a deadly weapon, but the rest of the rabble scattered like cockroaches. The protest, called the "Gaza Solidarity Occupation," caused such a stir that the campus had to shut its gates to unauthorized visitors.The university's Provost sent a missive to the campus community reminding them of the rules for a proper demonstration, saying erecting tents and causing disruptions won't be tolerated. The decision to close the campus gates was made to keep the peace and prevent further chaos.So, me hearties, let's all remember to be kind and respectful to one another, for we all deserve to sail the seas of academia without fear of harassment or bullying. Yo ho ho!

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