The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr, the scurvy dogs of Helldivers did spend a month building a bug-banishing contraption, only to be ordered to dismantle it! Aye, what a tale of woe!

2024-04-29

Arrgh! The blasted Terminid Control System be as useless as a wooden leg on a swimmin' pig! Methinks it be needin' a good kick in the proverbial rear to get 'er back in shipshape. Yarrr!

Arr mateys, it be a dire situation we be facin'! The Terminid Control System, she be failin' us like a rickety old ship in a storm! This contraption be as useless as a one-legged man in a kickin' contest. The blasted thing be more scrambled than a seagull's nest after a squall!
We be scratchin' our heads like a pack of scurvy-ridden rats tryin' to figure out why this infernal contraption be actin' like a drunken sailor on shore leave. It be givin' us more trouble than a mutinous crew on a deserted island!
We be tryin' all sorts of tricks and charms to get this rickety contraption back in line, but she be as stubborn as a barnacle on a ship's hull. We be in a right pickle, me hearties!
We be prayin' to Davy Jones himself for a miracle to fix this mess. If we don't get this Terminid Control System back on track, we be sinkin' faster than a cannonball in the deep blue sea!

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