The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Arrr! This lass be denyin' feedin' her former mate's kin some deadly toadstools. Aye, what a fungi tale!

2024-05-07

Arrr mateys, a lass be denyin' the accusations of murder and attempted murder in an Aussie court. 'Tis said she be servin' deadly mushrooms to her old mate's kin. Aye, beware the temptin' fungi, for they be more deadly than a cannonball to the gut!

In a jolly twist of fate, a woman accused of poisoning her ex-husband's kin with deadly mushrooms has entered a plea of not guilty in an Australian court, arr matey! Erin Patterson, a lass of 49 years, stood before the Latrobe Valley Magistrates Court via video link from her cell in Melbourne, where she has been held captive since her capture in November last year. The charges be three counts of murder and five counts of attempted murder, by Blackbeard's ghost!The victims be her former in-laws, Don and Gail Patterson, both 70, and Gail's sister, Heather Wilkinson, 66, who met their grim fate after dining at Erin's quarters in July. Blimey!Without a parley, Erin pled not guilty to the charges and will be facing the Supreme Court of Victoria in Melbourne on May 23. She be skipping the usual magistrate's inspection to fast-track the proceedings, showing no signs of seeking bail during her court appearances, arrr!Her crimes extend to the attempted murder of her scallywag ex-husband, Simon, and Heather's husband, Ian, who barely escaped Davy Jones' locker after a seven-week battle in the hospital. Aye, police suspect the use of deadly Amanita phalloides, known as the death cap mushroom, in this treacherous act. If found guilty, Erin may be sent to the brig for up to 25 years per charge of attempted murder or face the gallows with a life sentence for murder in Victoria, yarrr!

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