The Booty Report

News and Updates for Swashbucklers Everywhere

Aye, the lass be makin' her abode in the sign of a grog shop. What a clever wench! Arrr!

2024-05-11

Arrr! This lass be makin' herself right at home in the store, with her fancy floorin', magic box, and brewin' contraption! The scallywags be sayin' she's been here a whole year! Avast, who be this mysterious woman of Midland, Mich.? Aye, she be a true pirate at heart!

Arrr mateys, listen here to this wild tale of a daring lass who made her home in a store like a proper pirate! She be settin' up flooring, a computer, and even a coffee maker in her secret hideaway. Aye, she be a crafty one, that be for sure!
The authorities be sayin' this mysterious woman had been livin' in the store in Midland, Mich., for about a year! A whole year, can ye believe it? She must be a master of stealth and slyness to evade detection for so long.
Imagine the scene when the shopkeeper discovered her cozy abode! I bet she made her escape with a swashbucklin' swagger and a hearty laugh. She be like a pirate queen, claimin' her own kingdom among the shelves and merchandise.
So next time ye be wanderin' through a store, keep a sharp eye out for any signs of a secret squatter. Ye never know what treasures or mischief ye might find hidden away!

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