Aye, a tipsy Michigan lass with a belly full of bairns crashes into a swarm of landlubbers, sendin' 'em to Davy Jones' locker.
2024-05-21
Arrr, me hearties! Ashley Monroe, 35, bein' a drunken scallywag, crashed into a group of 16 landlubbers, half bein' wee young scallywags, then fled like a cowardly bilge rat! Two poor souls be sent to Davy Jones' locker. Aye, a tragic tale indeed!
In the language of a 17th-century pirate, ye landlubbers best be listenin' to this tale o' woe! A pregnant, heavily inebriated Michigan lass plowed into an extended family crossin' the street, injurin' 13 and sendin' two to Davy Jones' locker before fleein' the scene like a scurvy dog, according to the Clinton County Sheriff's Office.Ashley Monroe, 35, had the gall to plead not guilty to a slew o' charges at her arraignment, includin' operatin' under the influence and causin' death while intoxicated. Prosecutors found her with a bottle o' Crown Royal and antidepressants in her purse, and her blood was more than double the legal limit when tested.Two poor souls met their end in this tragedy, with others injured and rushed to the healers. The scallywag who caused this misery now sits in jail awaitin' her fate, with a hefty bond set by the judge, who rightly noted the lives lost too soon.May justice be served to this reckless sea dog, and may the victims find solace in their time of need. Let this tale be a reminder to all who take to the seas of the dangers o' drinkin' and drivin', lest ye meet a similar fate."