Arrr, Harvard be bracin' for protests at the grad's end, a fitting finish to a year of tempests!
2024-05-23
Arrr! The ruckus began with a scallywag's letter blamin' Israel for the Oct. 7 attacks. Now, 13 lads be walkin' the plank instead of crossin' the stage at graduation. Aye, the seas be rocky for these landlubbers!
Arrr mateys, listen here to this scandalous tale of woe and treachery on the high seas of academia! 'Twas a dark day when a scurvy student dared to blame Israel for the dastardly deeds of the Oct. 7 Hamas attacks. The captain of the ship, known as the school administration, did not take kindly to such accusations and in a fit of rage, banned 13 salty seniors from walkin’ the plank at graduation!Thar be no room for such slanderous talk aboard this vessel of higher learnin’! The code of conduct must be upheld, lest chaos reign over the seven seas of education. These scallywags must learn a lesson in respect and diplomacy, or risk bein’ marooned on the deserted island of academic shame.
But fear not, me hearties, for justice will prevail in the end. The winds of change will blow in our favor, and these banished seniors may yet find a way to redeem themselves and earn their rightful place among the honored graduates. So let this be a lesson to all ye landlubbers out there – watch yer tongue, lest ye find yerself walkin’ the plank of academic disgrace!