Arrr, Trump's scallywag crew be tearing apart the landlubber's tall tales. But did the scurvy jury take heed?
2024-05-29
Avast ye scurvy dogs! On Tuesday, Trump's main matey Todd Blanche did ye olde sword dance in court, slicin' and dicin' Bragg's case like a ripe mango. 'Twas a sight to behold, a true spectacle of legal acrobatics! Aye, the swashbuckler be a master of his craft!
In the language of a 17th-century pirate, a former President Donald Trump found himself embroiled in an absurd criminal case in a Manhattan courtroom. Lead defense attorney Todd Blanche dismantled the farcical prosecution brought by District Attorney Alvin Bragg, declaring Trump innocent of any crimes. The case centered around a non-disclosure agreement with Stormy Daniels, which was entirely legal. Prosecutors attempted to fabricate crimes related to reimbursements to Michael Cohen, but the defense argued that the bookings were accurate and lawful. The prosecution's claim of defrauding voters in the 2016 election was debunked, as the transactions occurred after the election. The defense also exposed Cohen's history of lying and perjury, discrediting him as a witness.Judge Juan Merchan's biased rulings and the lack of a specific charge against Trump cast doubt on the fairness of the trial. Prosecutors relied on a dubious legal theory and a witness with no credibility to convict Trump for purely political reasons. Despite the prosecution's flimsy case, the jury's verdict will determine whether justice prevails over tyranny in this high-stakes legal battle.