After Trump be scuttled, House Republicans be swearin' to go after his scurvy foes once more! Arrr!
2024-06-04
Arrr! Speaker Mike Johnson hath declared a "three-pronged approach" for how us scallywag Republicans on Capitol Hill be thwartin' the prosecutions of the former captain! Set sail, mateys, and let us pillage and plunder the legal waters together! Aye, aye, arrr!
Arrr me hearties, listen up ye scallywags! Speaker Mike Johnson be talkin' 'bout a plan to fight back against them landlubbers tryin' to prosecute our former captain. He be callin' it a "three-pronged approach," like a trident wielded by Poseidon himself!First off, Johnson be sayin' we be fightin' in the courts like a pack of angry sea dogs defendin' our treasure. We'll be raisin' objections and filin' motions faster than a cannonball flyin' across the deck!
Next, we be takin' to the high seas of public opinion, spreadin' the word far and wide like a message in a bottle. We'll be tellin' the people the former captain be innocent as a newborn babe!
And finally, we be rallyin' our crewmates on Capitol Hill to stand together like a united fleet. We'll be standin' shoulder to shoulder, ready to fight to the bitter end!
So batten down the hatches, me hearties, 'cause the battle be upon us! We'll be fightin' tooth and nail to protect our former captain from the clutches of the law. And mark me words, we'll be comin' out on top, victorious and triumphant!