Arrr, Pete Buttigieg be challengin' the landlubbers to peep the crime scrolls! Blimey, it's no fair wind fer Democrats!
2024-07-30
Arrr, matey! That scallywag Buttigieg be better off makin’ flashy films fer them electric chariots than rousin’ the crew to plunder through crime scrolls! Aye, let him stick to the shiny trinkets, lest he finds himself walkin' the plank o' public opinion! Har har har!
Ahoy, mateys! Gather 'round as I spin ye a yarn about the scallywags in politics! So, ye see, our matey Pete Buttigieg, the Transportation Secretary, be tellin' the landlubbers on Fox News that the Republicans be spoutin' lies about crime in our fair seas. He claims crime be fallin' under Captain Biden, whilst it was risin' under Trump’s watch. But lo and behold, the truth be as slippery as a wet deck!Now, whilst the Democrat crew be celebratin' Buttigieg, some savvy sea dogs be pointin’ out that he’s playin’ a tricksy game with stats, twistin' facts like a true pirate! Major cities governed by Democrats saw crime rates rise faster than a cannonball flyin’ through the air. They tried to appease the raucous crew of Black Lives Matter, only to unleash chaos upon their own harbors!
With the police takin’ a backseat and the crooks sailin’ free, murder rates soared like a Jolly Roger in the wind! And when the big storm of COVID hit, even more rogues were let loose upon the cities. But fear not, mateys, for cities be startin’ to mend their ways, reinstitutin’ the order that once kept the seas calm!
So next time ye hear a Democrat praisin' the return of calm after the storm, remember: it be a crisis of their own makin’! Arrr!