Arrr, matey! Aye, a scallywag be dancin' on the roof 'fore the cannon went boom!
2024-07-31
Arrr! A curious moving shadow be spotted atop the roof, right before the cannons went bang! 'Twas a clip from James Copenhaver, one o' the scallywags caught in the crossfire during the treacherous July 13 plot against the ol' captain Trump. Aye, the seas be gettin' wild!
Avast ye hearties! Gather 'round fer a tale most dire from the landlubbers of Pittsburgh! A video, captured by poor James Copenhaver, who be nursing his wounds, shows a scallywag skulking atop the American Glass Research building just prior to the thunderous boom of gunfire aimed at the former captain, President Trump, on a fateful night in July!At the stroke of 6:08 on the 13th day, a rogue, Thomas Crooks by name, readied his collapsible AR-15, lookin’ to make a name for hisself. But alas! The brave counter-snipers laid him low shortly after his wicked deed. Aye, Crooks claimed the life of the noble Corey Comperatore, a fire chief of good repute, and left two others, including the old salt Copenhaver, with grievous wounds.
As pandemonium erupted, Copenhaver felt the sting of the lead, more surprised than a ship’s crew in a storm! He didn’t even know he’d been hit twice, what with the shock and all. The FBI, those clever seadogs, be following Crooks' every move, tracing his footsteps from rooftop to rooftop, like a cat o’ nine tails on a wild sea!
So here we be, still ponderin’ why this scallywag took such a course! Arrr, let’s just hope the next tale be one of treasure instead of tragedy!